Monday, August 30, 2010

The Cod

(This is not the WASP that El is referring to, but it's still an important WASP.) 
Mel: El?
El: Yes, Mel?
Mel: I'm really glad I got back from The Cape (or as I like to call it "The Cod") in time for our show.
El: Me too. It would have sucked to do the "and El Show".
Mel: Also, I don't really belong on The Cod.
El: Why not?
Mel: Well, all of the vacationers there were very lovely & didn't gesture wildly with their hands & didn't have large facial features.
El: You mean, they were WASP-y?
Mel: Yes, but I wasn't going to say it like that.
El: Was everyone doing a lot of nouns as verbs?
Mel: What?
El: Like, did they "boat" and "bike" 'n stuff?
Mel: YES! And they called lobsters "lob-lobs".
El: How can you call it a "lob-lob" and then eat it?
Mel: Exactly!
El: Well, I'm glad you're back in a place where you can be your slightly disheveled, loud, big-mouthed self and do a show where we talk about vaginas 'n stuff.
Mel: Our show is so much more than that.
El: Sure. Sure it is.
The show is THIS THURSDAY - 3 days away - so make your res here for 3 reasons:

1. It's the most fantastic way to kick off your Labor Day Weekend.
2. You'll be the first to hear our brand new song "Facebook is Evil".
3. We promise to never say "lob-lob".

Mel & EL: Our Time of the Month
Really bloody funny. Period. 
with special guest comedian Poppi Kramer!

Thursday, September 2nd, 7:30PM
Comix, 353 W. 14th Street, NYC
$10 (cash) at the door
Delicious food & drink available but not required

Monday, August 23, 2010

Pasta Sweaty Heaven

Dearest People,
We want to admit that we have a slight fascination with Julia Roberts - the wistful looks, the teary eyes, the Muppet-sized mouth in various states of joyous laughter. Point is, we totally embraced the cliche and went to see The Movie together. We were surrounded by seven hundred and fifty other versions of ourselves - women in pairs (old ones, young ones, short ones, fat ones, rich ones, rude ones, lovely ones) who also came to bask in the glory of Pasta Sweaty Heaven or Italy India Bali or Eat Pray Love. It was all very pretty (especially the parts with Javier Bardem). We're actually working on a new show called Mel & El & Javier Bardem. Stay tuned!

(This the the picture we took of Javier after we told him about Mel & El & Javier Bardem. 
We think that look means "Yes!" en Espanol.)
But in the meanwhile, you're gonna have to settle for just Mel & El on Thursday, September 2nd at Comix. In between songs like "Facebook is Evil" (debuting this month for the very first time!) and "White Lady With a Black Baby", El will tear up while she stares wistfully into your eyes & Mel will use her giant mouth to joyously cackle as if you're fake-closing a jewelry box on her hand**. We swear to Shiva, it's gonna be grand.
Make a reservation here cause it keeps selling out. And book your Birthday Group pronto (that's "right away" in Italiano) if you want us to write the Birthday Girl or Boy a special Birthday Rap.
(Eat Pray) Love,
Mel & El
** Um...that's a reference to the scene in Pretty Woman that started off the whole Julia Roberts-giant-mouth-laugh-moment that now has to happen in all of her movies (kind of like how Tom Cruise always has to have a scene where he runs ridiculously fast). If you didn't catch the reference, you've just made us feel very elderly. You'll have to make it up to us by coming to the show. Click here to make your res. You're welcome.


 Mel & EL: Our Time of the Month
Really bloody funny. Period.
with special guest comedian Poppi Kramer!
Thursday, September 2nd, 7:30PM
Comix, 353 W. 14th Street, NYC
$10 (cash) at the door
Delicious food & drink available but not required
Reservations here!

Created and performed by award-winning funny femmes Melanie Adelman and Ellie Dvorkin with composer Patrick Spencer Bodd, MEL & EL: OUR TIME OF THE MONTH is a modern-day Laverne & Shirley full of dirty songs, delightful banter and devilish dish. Hailed as “outrageous” by The New York Times and “hilariously squirm inducing” by the Village Voice, MEL & EL features new material every single month along with special guests, phenomenal drink deals and a generous dose of the in-your-crotch comedy you’ve come to know and love.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Love It or Loathe It?

The Ballbra

(Please know that this particular Ballbra is called "The Boxer Seaman".)

Love it or loathe it? We don't quite know.

On the one hand, why shouldn't men have the option to separate their you-know-whats from their you-know-whos? Maybe it's nice to have that choice. And we're totally Pro-Choice.

On the other hand, BARF! Honestly, we don't know which is harder to swallow (no, forget it), the image of the product or the words "ball" and "bra" being put together in such a way. Actually, it could be worse. It could be called The Ballsbra or Your Balls Wearing a Bra. They probably ruled those out via focus group.
Does this product work for you or make you a tad queasy?

Fill. Us. In.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Vocabulary Lesson Number 12


F**KNESIA \fuhk-'nee-zhuh\ noun: 1. Complete or partial memory loss of what it feels like to have sex based on the fact that you haven't had it in ages. 2. Syndrome that leads to having sex with someone who was terrible in bed the first time. Related: f**knesiac - one who suffers from f**knesia.

Last night I slept with that guy who can't get it up unless he calls me "Mommy". Please call the doctor because I've obviously come down with a case of f**knesia.

Have you ever been stricken with f**knesia? We're dying to know. Comment below or Tweet us here!

Monday, August 2, 2010


(Leo, if you keep furrowing your brow, your face is gonna get stuck in that position.)

Mel is in charge today & she enjoys a list. She feels it brings a bit of order to an otherwise chaotic world. She believes world peace could certainly be achieved via list. With that in mind, we bring you a nice list of things you should know about MEL & EL:
1) What a lovely compliment:
"Mel & El are twin daughters of different mothers - spooky telepathic funny and they crack my shit up." - John Cameron Mitchell (Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Shortbus)

2) The last MEL & EL: Our Time of the Month was Standing Room Only. Mel hates standing for a show so this is your friendly reminder to click HERE to make a reservation, because the next show is THIS THURSDAY! THREE DAYS AWAY!
3) Mel & El are thrilled to be joined this month by Special Guest comedian Vicki Ferentinos! She is delightful and adorable and hilarious. And Mel & El can't wait to have her on the show.
4) If you can't make the show and feel sad on the inside, you can find electronic forms of Mel & El in the following places (Ooh! A list inside of a list! It's like Inception!):
M&E official website here
Join M&E on Twitter here
Join M&E on Facebook here
Join M&E on YouTube here
Buy the She's My Bitch CD here

5) Mel really enjoyed Inception. She thinks Leonardo DiCaprio will win "Most Consistent Brow Furrowing" and Marion Cotillard will win "How Does Anyone Actually Look Like That?"

See you at the show!

Mel & El