Thursday, October 15, 2009

Panties

El: Let's announce the winner of the thong panties from our Comix show.

Mel: Don't say "panties".

El: Why not?

Mel: People don't like that word.

El: I'm a person and I like it.

Mel: Yeah, but you're a person who also likes the word "moist" and I find
it intolerable.

El: Is it intolerable in all instances?

Mel: Yes.

El: What about moist brownies?

Mel: No.

El: Moist towelette?

Mel: Stop it.

El: Moist panties.

Mel: You are my enemy.

El: I have found your kryptonite!

Mel: The winner of the thong UNDERWEAR is Sarah Kaplan. Thanks to
everyone who came to the show. We had a total blast.

El: Enjoy your panties, Sarah. Don't put them in the dryer or
they'll shrink. Better to keep them moist.

Mel: I wish I knew how to quit you.



This is our business card. Hire us for something.



This was our favorite sign at the Equality March in Washington, D.C.




El thinks Mel looked very stylish with her flag.




Mel thinks El looked adorable with hers.



Sunday, October 4, 2009

Who Are Mel & El?



Click HERE to watch the important film "Who Are Mel & El?"

It WILL change your life.

We guarantee it.

Or...your money back.

Yeah. That's what.

One Night Only



El: I don't think people realize that our show is truly only happening for one night only.

Mel: I know. I think they think we'll be doing it again and again and that they'll have plenty of chances to see it.

El: How can we impress upon them the meaning of "one night only"?

Mel: We could sing the song from Dreamgirls.

El: No!

Mel: Why not?

El: I don't like the lyric "come on, big baby, come on". It skeeves me out.

Mel: Well I don't see any other option.

El: I do. Let's offer our friends a discount code to motivate them to buy a ticket now because this is their last chance to see a full-length Mel &El show in New York City until at least 2010.

Mel: One night only! One night only! Come on, big baby, come on. One night only, we oooonly have 'til dawn...

El: I told you not to sing it and you sang it. Why would you do that?

Mel: Because sometimes we have to hear things we don't want to hear.

El: Then I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you have a green thing stuck in your teeth.

Mel: Shit.

El: Let's go to the mirror and get it out. Come on, big baby. Come on.

Click HERE and enter the code GAYMARRIED at checkout for $12 tickets! That's $8 off the door price!

ONE NIGHT ONLY, KIDS!

Problem

Mel: El?

El: Yes, Mel?

Mel: We have a problem.

El: Break it down for me.

Mel: Everyone keeps calling to ask if we really have Britney Spears as our opening act.

El: No way!

Mel: Way.

El: We have Britney Houston - the drag queen internet sensation who's much prettier than us.

Mel: I know that!

El: Well, our Britney can kick over her head & do splits. Everyone will love her.

Mel: Terrfic.

El: And they will love us for opening our show with someone so bendy.

Mel: In future, we'll communicate more clearly with our people.

El: How's this?



Mel: That's totally clear, if a bit abrasive.

El: Good enough.

Mel: I gotta go practice my splits.

El: Wait for me!!

We Have Britney, People!

El: Is it true?

Mel: It's TRUE.

El: Britney is going to be at our Comix show?

Mel: She is! She really, really is!

El: I'm dying, I'm dying...

Mel: I'm DEAD.

El: I've been embalmed.

Mel: I'm in a mausoleum.

El: If people want to see her, they better get a ticket NOW.

Mel: That's so smart. Because if they buy now, not ONLY will they get to be in the same room as Britney, they will save $5 off the door price.
 
El: So we are GUARANTEEING Britney?

Mel: She is a done deal, my friend.

El: I'm decomposing.

Mel: I've already been reincarnated.

El: What did you come back as?

Mel: Britney's hooker-shoe.

El: I never knew you were such a fetishist.

Click HERE for tix!